Act Your Age

You Are 29 Years Old

29 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

What Age Do You Act?

Memorial

So, it was Memorial Day weekend and a good one at that. Here is the recap:

The weekend started off with a bang. On Thursday, Laura and I bought tickets on eBay to the Alicia Keys concert that was on Friday. The tickets were overnighted to us and on Friday night we were ready to go. We walked into the MGM Grand Garden Arena and found our seats. I was pleasantly surprised at how close they were to the stage (A++ seller lol). The opening act started and I didn't have the faintest idea of who it was. Apparently it was Faith Evans (the widow of Notorious B.I.G.) and I felt kind of bad for not recognizing her. Oh well, I was never a big fan. Anyway, when Alicia Keys took the stage she took command of the show. She was awesome. She sounded great, looked great, danced great, and played great. There was not one second of that show where I was disappointed.

Saturday was my day to relax. Janell came over and we just hung out for a while. Later that evening we went to her mom's house to celebrate Janell's dad's birthday. Nothing says 'Happy Birthday' like spaghetti and cake.

Sunday was my cleaning morning. I ditched church for the first time in a very long time and I cleaned almost every inch of my apartment until it was gleaming. Then Janell and I went to two movies, Miss Congeniality 2 (with her mom at the $2 theaters) and The Longest Yard. Both were funny. Afterward, I called Laura and Tina to see what they were doing later that night...of course, being the good Catholic girls they are, they were going to church. We decided to meet up afterward and have dinner at a restaurant and drinks at my house afterward. I expected it to be a party of 5 but it turned out to be a party of 9. It was clear to see that the 4 extra guests had already started their drinking before us so it made for an interesting night. We all went back to my place (I was very happy that I cleaned earlier) and I made some daiquiris and some people took shots. One of the extra guests (the only one I knew) brought in his guitar for entertainment. Who would have guessed that a little half-filipino boy with a mohawk would mostly play country all night? Definately not me. But, I guess you can never judge a book by it's cover, right?

Monday started off lazy, as any extra day off should. I had to go into work at my 2nd job and write paychecks, which is always worth it. After that I got ready for my first trip ever to Lake Mead. Janell, Megan, David and I grabbed our stuff and went. It was only 90 degrees which was nice. Over and over, I heard Megan saddened by how much lower the lake had become. I had heard many horror stories about Lake Mead, but despite them I got into the lake and 'swam'. It was pretty fun. I am glad that we decided to go.

So anyway, sorry if I bored anyone. I guess I just wanted to update, but I also really enjoyed my weekend, so thank you to all of you who were involved! And to all that were not involved, I hope you had a good weekend too! Take care. Bye.

Learning To Breathe: The Abridged Edition

Chapter 3: Of Dungeons and Dragons

In life, it is up to us to break free of our prisons and slay our own dragons. Easier said than done of course. In a literal sense, if one is locked in a dungeon they long to be free. They may adapt and make do with what they are given, but no matter how many ribbons are wrapped around it, it is still only a dungeon. It is never quite home and any which way they look, they only see walls. Walls that represent despair.

The dragon may come while the prisoner is jailed or after an attempt to escape. Either way the dragon is good at keeping the prisoner in check. No matter what. The dragon is never far in the prisoner's mind. "What if the dragon is right around the corner?" "What if I try to defeat the dragon, but fail" "What if the dragon slays me before I slay it?" These are valid fears, however an important thing to remember is that if the prisoner believes the dragon has won, then it has.

These dungeons are ones that are created by the jailed. If the imprisoned never try to break free of their prison, then surely they are stuck forever. Why live a life of imprisonment when liberty was at their very finger tips? The answer to that is simple, it is comfortable and safe. Within the walls that they have created for themselves they know the environment and there are no unexpected risks. The dragon keeps the almost-willing prisoner tucked safely inside their little room.

The first step for one to slay the dragon is to strip all of the gloss and realize that it is a dungeon that they have placed themselves and decide that it is not where they would like to be. After that, victory over the dragon seems easier. There is purpose in the fight and it is not easy to get the escapee to back down. Sure, after the prisoner is freed there will be other prisons and other dragons, but each instance gets a little easier with experience. No matter how deep and dark in a dungeon, to escape one must believe in themselves fully and it is possible.

Disclaimer: In no way am I endorsing escapes from actual real life prisons and please do not harm any komodo dragons.

Burst My Bubble

We all have our own personal bubble of space (I do anyway). This bubble grows or shrinks depending on the people around.

I was at the mall the other day and found a cute dress and decided to buy it. I stood in line and waited for my turn. I felt a bump and turned and saw a lady with a big diaper bag (no baby in sight) and she appologized and I gave a slight smile and turned back around. I felt the bump again and moved forward a little, careful not to violate the bubble of the person ahead of me. I glanced backward and saw that the lady behind me had moved closer to me again. I scooted up a half inch more and so did she. I was starting to get alittle wierded out by it since she was practically on top of me. I was happy to see that I was next in line, I knew I'd finally be safe from my bubble buster.

I walked to the register and she followed me! I turned and gave a puzzled/awkward smile and she smiled back. I was trying to send mental requests for help to the sales associate but to no avail. I was worried when the sales woman asked for my home phone number with this woman that was now attached to my back with me. The associate from the next register over called for the next person in line and I asked my 'new friend' if she was next and she said yes. The lady at the register next to me was confused for a second and asked "Aren't you two together?" I said "No" Finally she detached from me and I walked out quickly. Although she could now call my house, she wouldn't know where it was from following me.

Normally I don't care too much if a stranger is a little too close, but this woman was ridiculous. I'm sure she had her reasons...but they weren't clear to me. Oh well, I am safe and sound and haven't had any calls from my mystery piggyback rider.

Creating Space

So, the weekend is upon us again. It comes in a guise of a time to relax when really, it's just time to run a bunch of errands that there weren't time for during the busy work week and before you know it, the weekend is over and it's back to work.

Sometimes I think that there has to be more to life than what I'm making it into. What's the point of just getting by. Where is the part where I live a life in all of that. Sure, sometimes I see my friends or Janell but it's barely anything. I only come home to feed my cat and sleep. I don't want to work to live or live for my job when I know that there is so much more.

I could be working on my relationship, friendships, random hobbies and crafts that I never have time for anymore. I could be watching more movies, working out more, swimming, anything is better than my auto-piolot life that I am falling into. So, my plan is to try to break free of that, I am obviously not going to quit my jobs, but I need to evaluate my life right now and make room. I can clear some things like my church choir...although I love to sing, this isn't the style for me, so I may just quit and find a closer church (and obviously not sing since there are only traditional churches nearby){Sorry Laura, your church isn't for me either}...or I could change my Opa work schedule so I can fit in some time for other things... I'm not quite sure of what to do at this moment but I do feel the need for change before I go crazy.

Anyhow Happy Weekend!

Thank You L'Oreal!

Well, L'Oreal has done me wonders in the day that I've had my hair dyed. Although I'm not used to my hair, I've gotten many compliments. There are two big things though that I'd like to thank L'Oreal for though...

1. Due to my dyed hair, Laura's voodoo doll is now void

2. I got a raise at Opa because (and I quote) "You are beautiful, you get a raise starting tomorrow" but this was also particularly due to my contacts and my cute lilac shirt as well.

Sexual harassment? Nah, just words of a crazy middle-aged woman. At any rate, I just thought I'd share...and use my computer now that I've fixed it.

For the Lastest News...Stay Tuned

So, you all will be happy to know that I have finally mastered the whole contact lens thing. Thanks for your advice, it helped!

Also, this morning I found the lens that I lost...It was dried out and stuck to the bathroom mirror. lol. Hey, it's hard to see that stuff when you're eyes aren't working and you are frustrated as can be.

Let's see...I dyed my hair...I don't know if I like it yet. It's a shock for me (no, I'm not blonde now) I'm sure I'll get used to it as time goes...

Here's a random thing that annoys me. When searching for prescriptions glasses, they have a bunch of glasses out to show their selection. The problem is that when you try them on, how are you supposed to see how they look on you? If you are blind, like me, it is a big task. I have to get so close to the mirror that I can't really tell by how they look...and also, to make things harder, they have these huge stickers on them. I will only truly know if I like them after I order them and have them in my prescription...then it's too late to change my mind. So, anyway, I also bought a pair of glasses.

On another note, I am feeling highly rebellious in my music group. I decided not to practice my music and I contemplated not going (which I would never do...I can't just be that rude...not that they'd care) The music still turned out fine. I faked my harmonies and it sounded okay. On the upside, I got a compliment from a lady after mass saying that "You always know what you are doing, you seem so confident" LOL She must not have been there when I announced wrong songs, sang wrong verses, forgot announcements, or was shaking so bad that I didn't think I'd make it through the psalm. Well, it was nice of her to say anyway.

After Mass I had another surprise. Have you ever been somewhere where you didn't expect to see anyone that you would know but poof, there they are? It happened to me with someone I hadn't seen face to face in a while. There was the moment of: 'do I walk by and pretend that I didn't see the person or do I stay and see what happens.' I decided to stay and wait. It wasn't bad at all as I expected it would be. This is a person that I envisioned having voodoo dolls of me but it didn't seem that way that day. I greatly respect the effort that the person made to be nice to me, especially because they didn't have to. So that was the excitement of the day.

So there is the update of my life up until now...except I got my Dell and so far it's messing up...soooo I have a lot of fun stuff to look forward to fixing tonight!

No Contact

So, as some know, I got this huge bonus. I decided that I should use some of the money to go to get my eyes checked out. I went to the optometrist yesterday and got my eyes checked. It appears that my eyes have declined by 20% since the last time I had them checked (a little over a year ago). I decided that I would try contacts, which is more expensive for me because I have astigmatism. I've only put in contacts once so this was very challenging for me. I had a 10 minute lesson and was sent on my way. So, I tried for hours to get the contacts in but to no avail. I started to get very frustrated but kept on trying. I almost had it...but then...the contact lens dropped. I lost it. I searched everywhere (with my glasses on so I could see, of course) but it was no where to be found. Needless to say, I was very disappointed. The optometrist told me though, "Don't worry if you loose one, just come back and I'll give you another." And that would be great...if they weren't closed today. Ugh...anyway...I'm not sure if I want my contacts anymore, I am so frustrated. I am able to touch my eye just fine, but when something is attached to my finger I causes me to jump. Oh well....I might just get glasses instead.

Another Wasted Tuesday Night

Major Venting Ahead:

Every other Tuesday I come home very annoyed. I get so frustrated at choir practice. It's just a waste of time. We start off by sitting around for 15 mins or so while the members talk about random crap (I know all about tea parties for little girls and potty training now) and then the leader comes in and gives the line-up...I usually only know 10% of the music, the rest is music that sounds like it's really old. So then we start rehearsal. The problem is that the leader doesn't make any copies...we all have to lean over the piano to read the music. I am already not the greatest sight singer, but add a squinting factor and I am lost. So we go over the music in lightning speed time and move on. It's really hard to learn my part with a flat alto in my ear. I've pretty much given up on learning music at rehearsal, I just wait for the leader to fax me copies the next day (if she remembers) and go over it at home. Last night was worse because there was actually a song on the line-ups that I knew...but it was cut. The pianist didn't like the (as the leader put it)"Don B. notation style".

I am starting to get to a point where I want to give up on going to this choir. The only excuse that I would have is that I can't make rehearsals, but then again a lot of people don't go to rehearsal and just come to Mass. I don't really want to quit though because I really love to sing...I just don't want to be miserable every other week. Oh Well, I'll figure it out I'm sure...UGH!

20 Random Things About Me

1. I like giraffes

2. Blue is my favorite color

3. I don't remember finishing kindergarten

4. I am left handed

5. I am terrified of knives and needles

6. I HATE taking pills

7. I've lived in 3 states and have only visited 4 others

8. I've had three cats named Cricket

9. I used to be an atheist

10. I've tried to become a vegetarian

11. I used to be able to do a couple of breakdancing moves (and no, I won't do them now)

12. There are 2,591.16 miles between me and my mother and that is perfectly fine by me.

13. I really miss having structured music rehearsals...I do better in my group that has no rehearsals than I do in the other group that has rehearsals (but to be fair they warned me that they've named themselves "Mass Confusion")

14. I love potatoes

15. I took two shots (american graffiti and rumplminz) with almost everyone in my office yesterday afternoon(including the 2 owners and my 2 bosses)

16. I prefer Coffee Bean over Starbucks

17. I still have birthday balloons (from 4/18) floating around in my apartment (they are there for my cat to play with)

18. I get sad if I eat chicken wings...therefore I never eat them

19. I've been peed on by a lion (I guess my ex and I belong to him)

20. Because I have two jobs, I get paid between 6 to 7 times per month

Yep, it's all true...anyway...tada.

Dude, I'm Getting a Dell!

I'm excited. I have my very own brand new desktop computer coming on Monday. So instead of cancelling the internet, I decided to get a computer to hook it up to. Now I will be able to chat to Janell even if she is across town. lol. And maybe (just for you Laura) I'll put AIM on there as well.

I know that no one really cares and I don't have much to say about it, but I still thought I'd share!

Spirit

How I long for your comfort
For that warm feeling to wash over me
To know that everything will be okay
That what is meant to be will be

How I long for the wisdom I need
For the gift of your true sight or
To see into the future
That my fears can be put to flight

How I long for the strength you give
For me to do right for me
To hear of truths once hidden
That I can set them free

How I long for humility
For the knowledge that too I can bend
To work through the impossible
That wounds can start to mend

How I long to know what's right
For answers to be made clear
To dispel all of my confusion
That reassurance is near